How to be a Parent (Or...What NOT to do)

Did you know that you can scare your child so badly that they pee their pants? Oh yes. In a bright spot of parenting today, I scared my three year old so much that he could no longer control himself. I am SO proud. (I hope you are picking up on my sarcasm here)

After having one of the worst nights sleep, and enduring three hours of church (at 9 am) in a zombie-like state, it was finally time to go home. So, Ash went down for a nap and the kids played while I made lunch and Adam watched TV. After lunch, Adam headed off to a meeting for church. The kids were playing, and Ash was still sleeping, so in a brilliant parenting move I decided to take a nap, also.

When I woke up an hour later, I decided I should probably be a responsible parent and see what damage the kids did to their rooms. And damage they did! Everything was taken off of Jon's walls, and all of his toys were out of their bins and all over the floor. Great. So, I have Jon and Tay come in. I decided to offer them popsicles in exchange for cleaning up quickly. (My thought process was this way they wouldn't whine about cleaning. I was wrong). Jon said "No" and ran off, and Tay starts explaining how she doesn't really want a popsicle anyway, and it's Jon room, so she shouldn't have to clean it. I snap. I yell for Jon to come back. Again. And again. Now I am furious. I grab him out of the guest room and lay into him about how I am The Mom, and he has to listen to me, and I'm sick of him running away and saying no, blah, blah, blah. All of this, of course, was said in my sweetest mothering tone of voice. (Ha!). And while I was yelling at him, he peed. Poor boy. Of course, I didn't realize it yet. I took him to his room, and he immediately asked for his blanket, and proceeded to cover his wet spot, then admitted to peeing. I was still mad, so I took his pants and undies off and made him clean his room without them. Once he was done, he put undies back on. And I felt really bad. I scared my little guy so much that he peed. Great.

So, next time you are upset with your little munchkins, and they are being really awful and you just want to scream at the top of your lungs, don't do what I did! Take a few deep breaths, step away if you have to, and remember how much you love them. Because making your kid pee sucks.